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Santa’s Lists

With the hellidays (OMG! Hilarious!) in full swing out have come the santas. I like riding the subway with many christmas fabrications. Here are my three favorite santa moments:

1. Santa and an elf sharing a passionate kiss on the 4 train.

2. Santa with a Coors light and a NJ Devils jersey flirting with a German girl on the N train.

3. Santa discussing with someone about how he used to work for UPS on the R train.

All of these things were funny to me. Here’s another list of things that I think are unfunny and people need to stop thinking are funny.

1. Listing references in place of humor – You know who else can reference things that you also remember: A group of aging males who call themselves: Lyte Funky Ones.

2. The word “faggot” – Ironic or not ironic this is just overused and is no longer funny in any context.

3. Demitri Martin/Zach Galifianakis ripoffs – Ok, they were original when they included a multimedia presentation in their standup act, but now you look like an idiot as you try to explain a pie chart that neither makes mathematical or comedic sense.

I thought of another thing I saw on the subway that was funny. It was a perfect representation of mid gentrification (aka Williamsburgh). I saw a guy with tight leather pants a popped collar pea-coat and shoes with heels walk by a group of urban (aka black) teens. One guy checked out the leather pants after he heard the heels clomp by. All his friends called him a faggot and he retorted that he had thought it was a girl. Oh, objectification: how you burst open closets.

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