Why minnesota cold seems like a lot of work

I haven’t been truly warm for about 6 months now. Sure it’s 58 degrees outside and sunny right now, but that’s not WARM. It’s just warm. It is nice out right now. 

Every day I wake up and contemplate whether it is worth it to get up and turn on my computer because it is just too cold to do this pantsless. I usually come to the conclusion that I should just curl up into a ball and wrap myself tighter in my blanket. Last night I was reading a book in bed as I fell asleep (Whooo! Saturday Night!). I then realized that I had managed to wriggle out of all of my clothes and had closed my book, but I hadn’t turned off the light. It took me half an hour before I realized it wouldn’t be worth trying to fall asleep with the light on and I forced myself off my futon-bed and into the not-quite-warm world outside of my blanket. 

My big adventure last night was to walk to Super America – it was also the only time I went outside yesterday – and get a donut (which turned into two because there is a better deal if you buy two). On my way there I called a friend and talked to him with my cell phone. This involves having my hand brave the brisk 45 degree weather. When I got home and ate my two donuts and soymilk my hand was still not warm. I’m ready to be warm. When it’s warm, I will take walks. When it’s warm, I will do my laundry. When it’s warm, I will cook more often. All of these things are things I am unwilling to do because I am cold. Or, I am unwilling to do them and willing to blame it on the cold. One of the two. 

Either way Minnesota freezes my balls. But I don’t eat too unhealthaly. 

Here are the averages of how much I eat of each basic nutrition item:

Calories – 2427.9 … Fat – 76.582 g … Sat. Fat – 19.1 g … Cholesterol – 121.8 mg … Sodium – 2790.1 mg … Carbohydrates – 303.7 g … Sugar – 98.6 g … Fiber- 36.2 g … Protein – 71.9 g … Vitamin C – 185.76 mg … Calcium – 1321 mg … Vitamin A – 3360 IU … Iron – 11.232 mg

That calculates to these % of Daily Recommended Value based on a 2000 calorie diet:

Calories – 121.4% … Fat – 117.82% … Sat. Fat – 95.5% … Cholesterol – 40.6% … Sodium – 116.25% … Carbohydrates – 101.23% … Sugar – N/A… Fiber- 144.8% … Protein – 143.8% … Vitamin C – 309.6% … Calcium – 132.1% … Vitamin A – 67.2% … Iron – 62.4%

But since I eat more than 2000 calories per day, I calculated the percentages given the calories I eat:

Calories – 100% (duh) … Fat – 96.86% … Sat. Fat – 76.11% … Cholesterol – 32.76% … Sodium – 96.73% … Carbohydrates – 83.71% … Sugar – N/A … Fiber- 119.21% … Protein – 117.22% … Vitamin C – 255.91% … Calcium – 107.38% … Vitamin A – 55.64% … Iron – 52.05%

So, I eat plenty fine. Even if all of my meals take less than one minute to make and mostly involve cheese, crushed tomatoes, corn tortillas, and pasta. Once it gets warm I’ll have the energy to stay in the kitchen with my shoes off for more than five minutes and therefore I will cook nice meals.

Probably not. Probably I’ll just complain about the heat and eat a lot of ice cream.


One thought on “Why minnesota cold seems like a lot of work

  1. Pingback: Why H2$ seems like a lot of work « what it be, Bitches!

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